brief snapshots in time. memories and thoughts. disorganized and random.

Thursday, June 30, 2005

tent city

I took off work early, grabbed TheDog, and the two of us headed up to the mountains.

I slowly took my little car up the last (hopefully) little hill. there's no way I should have been driving it on the dirt road. when I got up the hill and saw the other cars, I carefully pulled off to the side.

*note to self: get a Jeep, get some clearance

there was only one couple there and one guy, but already four tents set up. hmmm, that's a little weird, but whatever.

the site was nice, not too far from the road, but very secluded. definitely not one of the more picturesque places, but perfect for the weekend.

we settled in, and started cooking dinner. there's nothing better than fajitas grilled over a camp fire.

a few more people showed up to help us drink after dinner. and eventually everyone retired to their respective tents.

I settled in on my Thermarest, worried I wouldn't be able to sleep at all. the accident was only two months before, and I hadn't slept more than a few hours at a time since then.

the beginning of the summer had been terrible. I was determined to salvage a part of the remainder of the summer. starting with going on this camping trip with my friends.

what, morning already? I slept so soundly and comfortably. I decided to camp out on my bedroom floor when I got home.

after breakfast, TheDog and I took a little walk, as hiking was still out of the question.

later in the day even more people joined us, including some friends and their kids and OhThoseEyes. he was harassing me that my boyfriend wasn't man enough to go camping, yet he didn't have a flashlight, and brought only a granola bar to eat. I had a spare light and there was plenty of food.

but the harassment continued.

he gave me an incredibly hard time when I declined the offer of a four-wheeling excursion in one of the Jeeps. um, yeah, bouncing around on incredibly rough roads with this damaged back, that sounds like fun.

it wasn't until we were shooting off the fountains for the kids in the middle of the creek* that OTE's friend was talking to me and let it slip that if the boyfriend and I were on the rocks, that OTE might be interested.

that would explain lots of things. his pitching his tent too close to mine. all of the harassment. the drinking game imbalance.

but I thought I was happy with my situation, and told OTE's friend that.


when my friend who set up that trip asked if I wanted to go this year I was a little hesitant.

there were way too many people last year. the tent city was too much for me. I'm not a fan of huge group camping trips. I'd camp solo if I didn't think it was a little too unsafe.

she insisted it would be smaller. just the core group. OTE was planning to go.

well apparently his immature ways have not ceased. when he found out I was possibly going, he told her he wasn't sure if he could go, anymore.

seriously? I know I'm impossible to get over (uh huh). but we were friends long before the drunken kissing in my kitchen. must this silly game continue? can't things just go back to the way they were before the drunken kissing?

* to reduce fire danger, of course. we'll get wasted and light exploding things, but no way did we want to risk a forest fire.


Anonymous said...

IMHO it seems to take guys longer to gain the maturity to honestly discuss their feelings with a good friend (woman) when it has to do with the two of them. It seems like it takes until you are 40 until you can tell your really good friend...that the drunken kissing wasn't a mistake...even if it never happens again. And that it should NOT negatively affect your friendship...if anything it added something...yeah, intimate, to an already intimate (non-sexual) relationship. He just needs to mature.

Love your blog.

The Lurker

Jeremy said...

I think you have a responsibility to your fans to take The Dog out into the mountains along with your camera and take some more of those amazing photos. And if you wanna travel, I have a bunch of buddies heading down to Crusty Butt (Crested Butte) to do some mountain biking, (I can't go cuz its my wife's b-day this weekend) and they are always up for drinking with a cute girl.

Hope the back feels well enough soon.

Yoda said...


I was going to post something along the lines of what Anonymous said, and then he (or she) said it.

Speaking only for myself, I didn't have a clue what I was about until I was 35. It's taken nine more years to expand that clue to an idea.

Some guys don't take an "opening" like the one you left for OTE back in May. It's harder when you're friends with a woman you're attracted to, because you want her to want you, but you don't want to screw up the friendship by overstepping the boundaries that have been defined for so long. So, you wait. For something concrete. More concrete than kissing while drunk. More concrete than talking about exploring the idea some more while discussing having kissed while drunk.

A couple years ago, RadiantSmile was papering the shelves in the kitchen cabinets of my then-new apartment, while I was doing other stuff...both of us were thirsty, but I hadn't moved the glasses to my new place yet...because the shelves weren't papered. We ended up drinking from the jug of lemonade in my fridge, passing it back and forth between sips. She took the first swig and passed it to me, and after I passed it back, she said, "That's the closest you'll ever get to kissing me!" I said something like, "Oh, yeah?" but in my mind, I was screaming, "PROVE HER WRONG!" In the end, I chickened out. In a way, I think not kissing her at that moment changed who we were to each other, just a little. Before she said that, I hadn't been thinking of kissing her at all, but clearly, she was. And I'm probably less of a man in her eyes for not rising to her challenge. It's sad, because my reason for not kissing her was respect.

What I'm saying is that if you think it might be worth trying with OTE, don't drop hints, just go for it. Don't leave him any doubt.

If not, then just give him time to deal with his feelings...he'll either come around, or he won't, and there's nothing you can do about it.


Valerie said...

some guys are so dumb. whatever! who needs an immature dork like that! OVER HIM!

GlitterGlamGirl05 said...

Guys are truly dumb, I agree w/ Valerie!

ramblin' girl said...

Hi Lurker, thanks. I know you and Yoda are right. But I miss his friendship, oh, well.

Jeremy, drinking with your buddies in CB sounds tempting, if only I didn't have plans already.

Valerie and GGG, of course you're right. I am and have been over him, just miss the friends thing... that's what really just sucks.

Maybe he'll grow up someday.

GlitterGlamGirl05 said...

Want to borrow my brother to make the man jealous? He's a bit young (26) but had a black lab (Finn) and loves to be outside camping, fishing, etc...

ramblin' girl said...


He has a black lab? definitely! TheDog is partial to labs.

And actually, your brother's not that much younger than OTE (I'm a younger guy magnet, that could be part of the problem.) But no one to make jealous, he's not going, reportedly because I am. now that's maturity!

Jen said...

It doesn't sound like he is worth your time. He needs quite a few more years to grow up.