brief snapshots in time. memories and thoughts. disorganized and random.

Sunday, January 15, 2006

nice plus

I had busy weekend. a great weekend. and this time I'll tell it from the beginning. only because the beginning fits nicely with my last topic.

my friends picked me up Friday to head up to the show. on the way, we had a very lively conversation about nice. I had described a guy that a friend had wanted me to meet as nice. C said that was a death sentence for that guy.

I tried to refute it. but after a while, I realized he was probably right. being just "nice" doesn't get you anywhere (with someone you're hoping to date). you have to be nice and something else. nice plus.

the show was amazing. nothing better than seeing a favorite band with great friends. the boys played most of my favorites. including Vincent of Jersey, the one I sang on stage in college with a couple of friends.

on the way home, some of our "nice" conversation resumed. I asked if being too nice was also a death sentence in the dating world, even if you had other things going for you. the answer was unanimously yes.

and so, between that. other friends telling me I needed to stop being so nice (to certain people). my sister trying to instruct me on how to be TheBitch on occasion. and being called both "too nice" and "too sweet" by two different guys in the last few days, I've realized there may be something behind my SO-less status besides terrible timing.

I know I can never be not nice. but now I'm going to strive for nice plus, but, of course, not too nice. we'll see how that goes.


kt said...

i like nice plus. and too anything is probably bad since it emphasizes an extreme. i think you have an inner bitch IN you.. you just need to let her out occasionaly. in a nice way, of course. ;)

Robb said...

Nice is ok, but not too nice. Too nice will bring the kiss of death.

dewey said...

Haha, you need meanie lessons! Feel free to consult me as your resident "not nice to nobody" expert!

clew said...

hey rg - thought i'd let you know i'm back. just had a brief flip out over the weekend. thanks for the note ... :) hope all is well!

Elizabeth said...


Sigh. Part of me just wants to tell you to just be yourself. That sounds so maiden aunt. I think I'm too nice. I try to be bitchy sometimes, really I do, but then my face flames and I have this horrible feeling that I've just been bitchy and I immediately apologize all over myself.


Just be yourself. Somebody out there is going to love it.