brief snapshots in time. memories and thoughts. disorganized and random.

Monday, February 11, 2008

red heart hope

I knew I was going to have to ask. Have to clarify our situation. But I almost didn't want to. I almost preferred to just go with having fun and not worrying about what the future held.

Sometimes when I get comfortable I don't mind the status quo, don't want to rock the boat. But I knew the time was coming when I had to find out.

Lately I'm the only one insisting on plans. I don't know if it's because he doesn't want to, or if he's too busy, or if he's just gotten used to me doing the planning.

But his showing interest in what we do, trying to plan things, is important to me. Some days, in particular. So I took a deep breathe and asked him.

Do we have plans for Thursday?

Of course what I meant was did you make plans for Valentine's Day. And his response was simply he didn't know, he had to work until fill-in-the-blank time.

Not exactly the sweet plans I had hoped for. Is it asking so much for my boyfriend to want to do something special with me on the silly red-heart holiday?


Glitter said...

It's not too much to ask. If he can't give you what you want, maybe it's time to re-eval and focus more on yoursel than anything with him.

hubs said...

he should be making plans with you. but it's not fair for you to limit the day in which he makes those plans. if he can't do it thursday, do it on the weekend. or next thursday. or maybe just ask yourself "do want plans with my boyfriend or do i want a valentines day date?"

ramblin' girl said...

hubs, my rant is not about the day so much as his not really caring about making plans with me. I thought there was maybe a chance for a near valentine's day plan on his part. I'm learning my thinking is completely off base.

Anonymous said...

OK, I've heard enough. Dump the chump if he does not come across with more solid plans. (I hope he does, but I'm betting he won't). Cheers & Good Luck! 'VJ' (BTW: Under the new handy system here, I'm betting almost everyone will be Anon in the near future.)

hubs said...

did you tell him you wanted to do something? have you made any plans?

i'm not trying to stick up for the dude (or for you) but sometimes you have to communicate exactly what you want.

my girlfriend and i actually avoid making plans on v-day because "couples" types of things are more expensive and often crowded, not to mention menus are usually fixed :)
This year were buying each other tickets on the ski train. He may be like us and trying to avoid the whole thing and do something later. but then again i might just be giving him the benefit of the doubt (which i have rarely done in past comments).

ramblin' girl said...

well, I do get it, hubs, but "plans" for me include hanging out at bar, my place, his place with a glass of wine or a beer. and it certainly doesn't have to be on actual Vday. just hoping for the tiniest bit of effort on his part to show he cares... and I did tell him I wanted to do something... he just continues to use work as an excuse.

hubs said...

then I would dump his ass.

Jen said...

I agree, the curb for him. RG, you can't keep going on miserable hoping that he will come around. He's shown you that he won't, therefore he doesn't deserve you. I know it is not that easy, but you shouldn't have to take that kind of treatment. either.