out of the loop

I was getting on the bus on the way to a far-off-campus party with my friends and their dates, when he walked past. He saw me and ducked his head.

I had thought he was my friend. A close enough friend that I could ask him to be my date without him getting all weird about it. When I asked, he had answered that he was sorry he couldn't go, he was leaving town. Apparently not.

And even though he was only a friend, I still got that crushed sensation. Maybe because he was a friend. Because someone I considered to be a friend couldn't just tell me the truth.

I got that sensation again tonight. Looking at a friend of a friend's site I found out a guy I dated is now hanging out with her. Until tonight, I'd thought she was my friend, too.

I have no claims on him. We have remained friends, but not that close. I just would have liked to have known.

One of them should have told me. The boy, who less than a month ago made me an interesting proposition. Or the FoF. Or at the very least, my friend. She's the one who introduced me to him, surely she knew they were hanging out.

I actually think they would make an interesting pair. Interesting in a good way. But I hate that feeling. The feeling that everyone knows something I don't. Where I am the joke.